A Man’s Guide to Dealing With an Angry Woman Who Won’t Abide By Her Own Silent Treatment


First of all let me say that I decided to write this post mainly from my own failed attempts at dishing out the world-famous, world-renowned silent treatment tactic. It is one of the oldest punishments women hand out to men and I would like to believe that at some point in time, maybe years ago, it worked.  As for now, sadly I don’t think that most women realize that many times after a heated argument men wish for the silent treatment. I would dare to say that the strange, blank, unresponsiveness stare displayed many times by men while women are “telling them off”  is a silent prayer that they will be issued the silent treatment. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that this is always the case, but many times it is.

A note of advice to the men, arguing with a woman is like arguing with a stop sign, they won’t be moved. And guess what, ignoring a woman while she is talking to you a.k.a “telling you off” is also a losing situation. If you say nothing then to her that means that you could care less about what she is saying and that is almost as bad as telling her that she is wrong…almost.

Now on to the not so silent, silent treatment…

Men, when a woman has decided that she is mad enough at you that she is going to resort to the silent treatment, don’t say anything that even resembles “I Don’t Care” or “I Can Do That Too”. Both of those responses will get you involved in another argument all together that will include topics that have nothing to do with what you had been previously arguing about. These things may range from something you did five years ago up to you forgetting the anniversary of your first kiss. Things will get really ugly if you try to provoke a woman who has decided to be silent…even though you both know that silence for her means not being nice and does not at all include not talking.

Men, when a woman is extremely mad and wants to threaten you with the silent treatment, say things like, “Baby is that really necessary” or “Let’s talk about this, I am sure we can work this out.” Now honestly neither of those will help you out any, BUT it is better than saying “I Don’t Care” or “I Can Do That Too.”

For those women that can actually be silent during the silent treatment, men should give them their space yet apologize for whatever it is that they did that upset her. BUT MEN please, I beg of you, whatever you do, Please, Pretty Please do not say “I apologize for whatever it is I did to make you mad” or “I’m sorry that you got upset about what I did/said.” Men those two “apologies” will launch you into an even bigger argument than the one that started the silent treatment argument. To a woman this means that you are not owning up to what you did wrong which means that you are dong is insulting her, so please avoid those two phrases.

For women like myself who make threats of the silent treatment but have no real intention of being silent, men this is a tricky one. See we are so upset that we would love to be able to refrain from talking to you. However, we can’t.  After we make a few threats of the silent treatment we will then issue a few other threats such as “I’ve Had Enough” or “I’m Done, This is Over” or “I Can do Bad All By Myself, so you can just leave.” Now after we have said those things that we don’t mean we will then say, “And don’t talk to me, because I am sick of your S*it”.

As a man you probably know us well enough to know that right now is not a good time for you to talk, so you stand there waiting for the next threat. Yep…here it comes. “I have nothing else to say to you.” The phone will then be hung up (in your face) or she will walk away. If this argument was via a phone conversation in approximately five minutes you will begin to get a string of text messages telling you how much she dislikes you and how awful you have been to her. You have been just awful and she doesn’t understand why she stayed with a jerk like you for so long. She is such a fool. (These words will come from her and not from you, funny isn’t it lol)

Men, you now have to choices. You can either A. ignore these frivolous messages or B. reply to the messages with nice “in love” type things that you may not even mean. If you ignore the messages, then the phone calls will start and they will include her telling you off once again and you won’t be able to get a word in because she will cut you off every time you open your mouth to speak. (You lose)

If you decide to text back, you may be able to end the war because now the angry dragon a.ka. your woman can see text messages of nice things that she thinks you may possibly mean; even though she is a big fool and has wasted her best years with you :-/

If the argument was a face to face argument, once she issues the silent treatment she will then walk off…only to return in approximately five minutes to argue a little bit more. This will continue every few minutes until there is no until…maybe until she gets tired or sleepy or has to leave.

So my best advice to men who have to deal with women who can’t abide by their own silent treatments is to not ignore the argument, but do ignore the foolishness. If in any way you can calm down the situation by saying something nice, do so, because when dealing with a LOUD woman who loves to threaten the silent treatment, you either play nice or lose badly and losing badly means hearing more of her” not so silent treatment.”

8 comments

  1. BlackGirl:

    Women have the power in relationships, so, men should never think that they’re gonna change that dynamic anytime soon. The problem that most men have in dealing with women, is, knowing how to debate and disagree with a woman without foul language and physical abuse. Women are verbal, and they like the back and forth of arguing, nagging, etc. On the flip side, most men aren’t as verbally expressive as women are. Men who can’t articulate their thoughts to a woman handicap themselves with all women. Intelligent convo matters to women, in and out of the bedroom.

    Tyrone

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  2. I am still laughing out loud at “until….there is no until!”.

    While you may have described me perfectly while I am having the millionth argument with my boyfriend ONLY practice the silent treatment when i am so discouraged about whatever the situation is that I have no more words to say, which is a rarity!!

    I don’t threaten to be silent, I become silent so that I can think about the situation and respond in a more positive way!!

    In fact my SILENCE is more deadlier than my bark and I would prefer to be left alone until he is ready to apologize…. Which he usually does 🙂

    Great read!!

    Love the post!

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  3. @ Tyrone I am finding that as an intelligent, outspoken, logical balck woman that it is hard to have a conversation, make a statement or suggestion to an insecure man without the conversation becoming a power struggle!!

    Also why do u think some men can’t understand when he has lost an argument? Why can’t he stop arguing BEFORE the words that cone out of his mouth are NO LONGER relevant to the conversation
    at hand! LOL

    Oh and on my first post I am NOT the one to bring up things that are irrelevant to the current situation. I can’t stand that!!! LOL

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  4. I NEVER threaten a silent treatment! I give the silent treatment! WHY? Because I don’t want to argue! I don’t want the yelling and tears. Men always feel they are right, so why waste my time? They know they are wrong. They can’t admit it and always turn around and blame you. When my man can’t have his way, he will send a nasty text with an LOL at the end. That makes matters WORSE! I would rather not bother with him, go be myself and cool down, then start a huge fight. It works for me!

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  5. Thanks for the article. I don’t know why recently i’m out the silent treatment.
    And I also don’t know why I can’t accept his apology.
    Now, I know.
    Thanks. It really helps. =)

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  6. “Women have the power in relationships, so, men should never think that they’re gonna change that dynamic anytime soon”

    LOL. I hope Tyrone has found his balls since posting that.

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  7. ….. I im concerned women actually think this is relevant to men, you have described for all intents and purposes an individual deceiving both themselves and their partner with the “understanding” that the action itself is meaningless and purely for the sake of hurting or gauging the response of another. This is not healthy , the end. If you want to avoid this in the first place then sit and talk over these things well in advance of the problem or instead of going into a talk with a point listen to each other and if niether of you are happy with the end result thats called a compromise. If these measures aren’t enough then seek a third party not one of your friends not some poor sob walking by, but a proffesional. If its still not enough to avoid these feelings each of you need to sit down privately and soul search for if your ready for a committed relationship, if so spend the effort to work through it. If not do everyone a favor and make a clean break that doesnt mean run away or leave a note that means go and say ill be gone in an hour im sorry _____________ neither of us is happy and we both deserve to be. (packs shit respectively walks to door) goodbye.

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