It never fails…I’m driving along, I stop at the red light, I feel someone staring at me and as usual, it’s a guy in a car in the next lane. Not a guy that I would be interested in, if I were desperate enough to stop and exchange numbers with some stranger at the red light. No it’s a guy who looks as if he could be my grandpa or my great uncle.
It never fails. Men who marched in the Civil Rights movement seem to love them some BGT. I don’t know why, but they seem to be attracted to me and I wish they would stop it.
Don’t get me wrong, I have dated older guys before, actually older guys used to be my preference, but not guys who were kids when television used to actually go off at night. I do have limits! I have no problem with an older guy, but there is a difference between older and old…and it’s not just the ER at the end.
But it happens on the regular, an older guy says hello, I say hello back, all the while praying that he is happily married and is only being friendly. My wishes don’t come true (as usual) he tries to be a little too friendly, I give him the “ok, let’s not go there signal”, he decides he will push his luck and crack some kind of ridiculous joke, I give him the straight face and keep it movin’.
I have always thought of it like this. I have no interest in dating a man that I have to take to doctor appointments for his dementia and help into his wheelchair. Yes that is an exaggeration, when it comes to the old men who hit on me (even though one was in a wheelchair) but that is the thought that comes to mind when these old men approach me, because they seem so old to me. I also consider the fact that I have two young sons, what could they do with grand pop. Well, they could do things with him that they would do with their grand pop….
Even when a handsome old gent tries to rap to me, thoughts of arthritis, impotence and Alzheimer’s creep into my head. Not that I would consider dating an oldie but goodie anyway, but those thoughts keep me from even entertaining their conversation.
I asked a friend why he thought I kept attracting old men and he gave me the most ridiculous, far-fetched, so stupid it must have come from a man answer imaginable. He said that I attract older men because of the “I’m the ish, Ms. independent, Hey look at me, No don’t look at me, Ooh don’t say shit to me” vibe I put off. He said that the older guys dig that, but the younger ones feel like I would be too much of a hassle. Plus (and he actually said this) all of the guys around my age that I would be attracted to are in jail.
After I fell out laughing, I told him that I see plenty of guys in my dating range that aren’t in jail, didn’t just get out of jail or aren’t headed to jail. Some of them are very attractive. But they are taken. They may not admit to being off the market, but they are. They are either happily attached or telling the happy lie that they aren’t. If they aren’t attached they are still ready to play grade school games, and that my friend I have no time for.
So now every time I pull up to a red light or go into a convenience store (those two places seem to be chocked with old men who feel flirty) I keep my eyes aimed straight ahead and when in the store I move swiftly and strategically. I don’t want to give anyone the idea that I may be interested.
….has this strategy worked for me so far? Nope. but I’d rather look uninterested than have the pretense that I am up for conversation or anything else the oldie but not so goodies have to offer.