Spanking


 I took the Spanking Poll this morning and was elated  to see that the majority of the people who voted (87%) spank their children. And according to the poll they aren’t just giving those little tap tap on the hand spankings. GO US!!!    I grew up getting whippings (not spankings) I wouldn’t dare call those spankings, and I turned out just fine. I remember reconsidering all mischief before doing it because I knew there would defiintely be a price to pay for the wrongdoing. Much of the mischief was just too tempting and I followed thru on them anyway, but afterwards I would sit around the house nervous and biting my fingernails down to the knubs just knowing that my mother would find out and out would come the belt. Back then I think parents had some kind of superhuman powers where their brains were automatically pinged when a child got out of line. Now what really pressed me to think that there was something abnormal about parents back then was that after they were pinged, they would then pretend as if nothing was wrong until they were ready to get out the strap. They would fix dinner, clean the house, watch the news, iron clothes and chat with neighbors until it was time for the punishment. All the while the child was somewhere trembling because even though the parent hadn’t even mentioned what they had done they knew the superhuman parent knew and would pounce on them soon enough.

 Now it seems as if many parents allow the ultimate No No; backtalk. Sure backtalk existed back then, but Lord knows it was not permitted. I wouldn’t have even dared say to my mother anything to the liking of “I don’t want to”, “Leave me alone” , “Shut up” , “That’s not how it happened” etc. And never would she have asked me to do something and I were to respond “No”.  It would have been a sad, sad day in my house, for I would have gotten a whipping that would have me afraid to even write the word no on a piece of paper, nevertheless say it to my mother.

Now that I am a mother, I have indeed followed in the family tradition of whipping.  For me whipping isn’t a thought, it’s a way of life. I don’t whip my son for everything he does wrong, but sometimes whippings are definitely in order and I definitely get on the job.

 

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20 thoughts on “Spanking”

  1. A word of warning: They say that children are grateful for the discipline when they grow up, but it’s not necessarily true. My parents never allowed me to disagree with them on anything, and, at 34, I still can’t forgive them for it. I am frequently seen around town with my custom T-shirt that says MY FATHER DIED BEFORE I COULD KILL HIM. I really mean it, too.

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  2. I was beaten as a child also. I cannot see how this helped build charcter. In my case itwas bullying behaviour driven by parental anger and it was humiliating. It has caused me a great deal of difficulty in my relationship with my own parents in later life. Thankfully I found a way to reconcile all of this. Don’t get me wrong .. I don’t fault my parents, they were following a cultural norm that I have come to understand but it doesn’t mean I have to do the same. Fear, violence and humiliation are not family values for me. Raise your children as you see fit, I am sure you feel this is best. But don’t stop thinking about it and considering if it really is best. It’s too late when your child grows up.

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  3. I know that there are many people who were abused, but being abused and get whippings are two different things. Some parents do take it too far and in those cases it is abuse. But I am a person who gre up getting whippings and everyone I knew got whippings and NOT ONE has felt abused. NOT ONE has gotten older and regretted getting whippings growing up.

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  4. My wife and I have decided to not go the whipping route. Not that I don’t think about doing it everyday. The reality is that my father whipped my booty on a fairly regular basis and it never deterred me from doing horrible things, similar to you. Plus the punishment never truly fit the crime; every offense got a spanking. That being the case I figured it doesn’t work as a form of discipline. I actually don’t talk to my father much anymore in part because I have lost a lot of respect for him. I totally agree with you that back talk is a real issue with kids these days, however I believe that’s because the values of our community have changed, not because kids are meaner than ever or parents aren’t handing out enough whippings. We can agree to disagree on this subject. :-]

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  5. There is a big difference between a small swat with the hand and a pants down whipping with a belt. I think most parents wouldn’t go as far as to give that hard a spanking.

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  6. I grew up the same way with parents who ‘got the job done’ when it came to whipping my two sisters and I. As I child I can’t say I liked them, but looking back on it as an adult, I can say that my upbringing has helped to remind me of the importance of ‘respecting your elders’, which is something I instill in my two sons today.

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  7. When I was a kid and had done something seriously wrong, my Daddy would take his belt off in front of everyone, double it up and then march me to the garage for a good butt burning. Part of the punishment was having my siblings know that I was about to get a whipping, seeing Daddy with belt in hand taking me outside. It was mortifying and I know they could even hear what was happening because I could hear when one of them was the one bent over the work bench with her panties down, getting the strap. That was just the way it was back then. You did something bad, you got a session with the belt and it was laid on too. My Daddy believed in a thorough whipping, from butt to the backs of the legs, they were set on fire. I imagine he would be put in jail these days because I did have welts and bruises afterward. I never went to jail though and only got in trouble once at school…of course when that was discovered, I got a trip to the garage with him:-) I appreciate being brought up to have manners, respect for authority and to obey laws. Kids these days do not have the limits that I did and I am sorry for them. I would much rather see some serious discipline happen in the home, rather than kids being sent to boot camps and/or jail.

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  8. but being abused and get whippings are two different things.

    Amen, ma’am! A-freakin’-MEN!

    By the way, I don’t know if you’ve seen that some dipsh#t California legislator is proposing a bill that would make spanking a criminal act. That’s right, this woman thinks that if a parent gives their kid an open-handed swat across the tush, that’s the same as assault and abuse, and a parent could go to jail and/or lose custody of their kid to the state! Interestingly, though not surprisingly…this woman has NO KIDS!

    Fortunately, it doesn’t look like the bill has a snowball’s chance in Hades of passing. Maybe spanking works and maybe it doesn’t, but that’s hardly the point. Both Republicans and Democrats seem to think that the state telling parents how to discipline their kids is a grotesque overreach. I would agree.

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  9. Love your blogging title by the way. I stumbled upon your blog after finding Mr.Fab’s truly fantastic blog… Anyways, I grew up getting whooped- and when I have children I will stick it to them as well because like you, I NEVER talked crazy to my momma, she put the fear of God in me, and my children will have the same. I turned out pretty damn great cause of that- now my older brother didn’t get enough so he’s all messed up..I won’t make that same mistake.

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  10. I think spanking is unneccessary and just plain wrong. There is never any reason to hit a child. Why not try not spanking for just 30 days? Do you think you would be able to refrain from spanking your son for just a month? Is it possible that you would consider other non-violent methods of discipline? One last question…why would you be elated at the thought of so many other people hitting their children?

    Other than your views on spanking I like your blog and I’m linking it to my blog Personal Growth for Black People

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  11. when i young both my mother and father whipped me dad with his belt mother with a strap sometimes both in one day . my bottom was not only red welted but would bleed sometimes the worst is when a the other children and sisiters would watch, i was allwas whipped in public so that others could what was in store for them , it was more imbarasing to have the grils watch and count than the whipping ,

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  12. I grew up getting whipped, but after hearing all this stuff about how the child can grow up to have severe emotional problems my husband and I decided we will give time outs andtake away our sons priviledges. well he can care less if he gets dessert or has to go to bed early because of his behavior. I started whipping his behind and I got results. He is following directions and not acting out in school. I let him jnow if you can not respect and follw directions i will set your behind on fire. he has no problems with selective hearing or memory and he follows directions now. So long live Spankings!!!!!!!

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  13. @SmLewis

    I have always believed in spanking but I was never one of those parents that raised their hand to spank at everything the child did wrong. I grew up getting whipped and I knew I benefited from it.

    I completely know where you are coming from on the time outs and taking away the privileges. A lot of kids don’t care about time out or if you take away a toy for a day…but they don’t want a spanking. That will keep them in line.

    And as I said, not for every little thing, but yes, when it is in order, its time for a good spanking.

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  14. Discipline is vital for children. They need to learn respect for their elders. But in today’s world too many of the ‘elders’ are not respectable! An undisciplined child flounders and acts out just so someone will notice them. Negative attention is better than no attention at all. Sometimes it’s about choices and consequences. God teaches us painfully and immediately that we can’t defy the law of gravity. We should parent like God does. Make the rules clear and when they are contravened, a painful and immediate consequence should follow. What that discipline entails is dependent largely on the individual child. Spanking works for some, taking away privileges works for others. For very sensitive children, even a harsh word will impact on them. Discipline involves lots of communication. It is never an excuse for child abuse just so parents can take their anger or frustration out on someone who cannot defend themselves.
    My 2 cents worth.
    Jem

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  15. I think whoopins’ should continue. When I was young my dad would wear me out with that brown thick leather belt and it kept me in line.

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